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Review: Movie 43

Movie_43_PosterStar power is no match for tasteless, offensive and unfunny comedy.

The “Movie 43” wraparound features Dennis Quaid as a lunatic with an abysmal script who forces Greg Kinnear’s movie producer to buy the piece at gunpoint. Coincidence? Probably not, as almost each and every sketch of this comedy anthology is so silly, nauseating and degrading it seems like the only plausible way the producers could manage to recruit so much top-notch talent.

Hugh Jackman and Kate Winslet make it through better than most. Jackman will likely never live down having a pair of testicles dangle from his neck for the sake of this movie, but between the giggle-worthy visual and the duo’s charm, “The Catch” is easily “Movie 43’s” finest few minutes. Naomi Watts and Liev Schreiber’s “Homeschooled” is another portion that at least respects its leads, but breaks down entirely when the scenario drivels on and right into a strange and unsatisfying conclusion.

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Review: Straw Dogs

Whether or not you’ve seen the original, the promotion campaign for Straw Dogs lays it out quite clearly; this film boasts a bloodbath. Emotion? Character development? Some sense? Not so much. But, if you’ve got a taste for this type of horror film and don’t mind forgoing effective storytelling for some gruesome and original kills, it might be worth a watch.

Big time screenwriter David (James Marsden) and his wife Amy (Kate Bosworth) ditch Los Angeles so he can take some time to write at Amy’s remote childhood home in the Deep South. Amy had always wanted to leave home since she was in high school and once she got that opportunity she never looked back, but now that her father has passed and the house is vacant, she’s willing to return.

Upon arriving back in Blackwater, Amy’s greeted by the locals including former football coach and town drunk Coach (James Woods), his cheerleader daughter Janice (Willa Holland), the local sheriff (Laz Alonso) and her ex, Charlie (Alexander Skarsgård). Charlie’s a contractor and, in an effort to make nice with the townsfolk, David hires him and his boys to fix the roof of their barn damaged during a hurricane. Charlie happily takes the gig as well as the chance to stay close to Amy. With David’s distrust ever present and Charlie’s affection for Amy as strong as ever, Charlie gets far too close for comfort.

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8 Great…Weapons the Movies Taught Us to Always Keep Handy

Who doesn’t wonder what they’d do if an unwanted visitor came to their door in the night? With the remake of Sam Peckinpah’s Straw Dogs about to hit theaters, you can’t help but consider a potential plan of defense or attack, if it came down to it.

When I was younger, a neighbor of mine woke up to a strange site: a bloody man stumbling towards her kitchen door. He comes in uninvited and, with kids in the house, she does what any mother would do — defend her family. Her weapon of choice? A Maglite.

What would you have done in that situation? If keeping a gun rack in the house isn’t your thing, here are a few items movies have taught us to use that should get the job done if you ever need to thwart a home invasion.

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